scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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