??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
