Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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