Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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