can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
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