drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Randomize