Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
