before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Randomize
