I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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