I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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