Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
