: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
