don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
no more duck duck goose at the bar
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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