So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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