just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
