Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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