i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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