Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
