I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
