I heard we made out
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
you would pick up someone in the library
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
