What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
