Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
