After last night, I could never be a politician.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm both gender and math confused
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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