Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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