Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Help. Why am I so naked?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
