Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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