I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I supernannyed him into submission
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
