Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
