Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Randomize
