She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
