Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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