I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
