He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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