whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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