I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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