cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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