That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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