kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
