Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
