We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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