Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Randomize
