My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
