i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
