It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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