so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
