Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
