Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
