her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize