I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
