Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
